"Dear Phil," the letter read, "Haven't seen you in forever, buddy. How are you doing? I just bought a beautiful little lodge up on a lake in Michigan, and I hope you'll stop by some time. Write back soon. Your friend, Harvey."
Phil was elated! He promptly wrote Harvey back, graciously accepting his invitation. A week later, Phil arrived in the little town of Cutlet Creek, where he was picked up by Harvey in his battered pick-up and taken to Loon Lodge, a beautiful, though slightly decrepit, cabin up in the timbers overlooking Loon Lake. The first few days of vacation were wonderful for Phil. Long, relaxing days. Lazy afternoon swims. Warm beds. Cozy campfires. Fresh air. Phil enjoyed every minute of it. Until one crisp night, that is.
Phil and Harvey sat around a crackling campfire. Phil was set to leave in a few more days and was enjoying his last campfires. He and Harvey had spent an amazing week in genial companionship. They had certainly rekindled their past friendship. But on this cool evening, everything changed.
The men were roasting marshmallows over the glowing fire, when, suddenly, two, ginormous grizzly bears, a male and female, stepped out of the surrounding woods and appeared in the clearing. Harvey and Phil started, shocked at the appearance. Harvey began to whisper, "We've never had bears out here," but before he could get it out, the male grizzly bear rushed over and gobbled him up. Phil was stunned. His friend! His cronie! He must do something.
He ran for Harvey's truck and drove into Cutlet Creek as fast as he could. He jerked to a stop in front of the Sheriff's Office and raced in. "Sheriff! Sheriff!" he cried frantically. "Harvey's been attacked and eaten by a bear!" Sheriff Oakley, who liked Harvey, hurriedly jumped in the truck with Phil and went back to Loon Lodge.
Well, when they arrived, just their luck, the bears were still there! Phil practically dragged Sheriff Oakley towards the campfire. "He's in that one!" Phil cried, pointing at the tall, male bear. "He's in that one!" Sheriff Oakley looked from Phil to the bears. Then he began to chuckle a deep, hearty chuckle. Phil stared at him, flabbergasted. When he stopped laughing, the Sheriff wiped the tears from his eyes and said lazily,
"As if I would ever believe a lawyer who said the Czech is in the male."